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If you’re involved in a troubled relationship, it can be all-encompassing.
It’s also very tempting to adopt the role of the savior because you get to be the “together” person, the responsible one. When I asked myself these questions, I saw that I wanted to be loved and to feel safe.
Love is what you do.” ~Unknown I used to think that true love should be passionate and intense.
When someone broke up with me or treated me poorly, I’d imagine that he really didn’t mean it.
Once you’ve considered these questions for yourself, consider what changes you’ll need to make in order to have the kind of relationship you want.
I came to understand that I’d have to give up the idea that drama was an indicator of true love.
I always feel safe with him and we go hiking and mountain climbing instead of breaking up every few weeks.
Ask yourself what kind of relationship you want to have. I also realized that once I discovered that this was the case with a particular person, I was very reluctant to let him go.
Instead, I’d hang on for far too long in the hopes that things would get better, which they never did.
Surely he was really a good person and truly loved me, but was just “going through something” or “needed space.” Eventually he’d be back with tears, apologies, and flowers.
I’d like to say I outgrew this tendency by the age of, well, maybe forty, but the fact is I didn’t.
If you really want to have a fulfilling relationship, then it’s time to make choices that are consistent with your desire.